Guest Series. From a Birth Mom.
God has a weird way of doing things in our lives.
I had for a long time wanted to be a surrogate. I had spend some time looking into it prior to my relationship with Mike*. Once we started a relationship I knew I needed to hold off on that at that time in my life but it was always in my mind. When we were together, and with living in separate homes and towns for that matter, we both had said we were good and we’re not wanting to have anymore children. Who knew I would find out in the same week just a few days apart the I was pregnant and 6 months along and finding out it was a boy all at the same time?! Life got crazy fast!
I was already a single mom of 3 and did not want to start over with that adventure in life with my youngest being 6. I couldn’t put anything together in my mind on how we could possibly make it work with out completely uprooting 5 kids between the two of us to be in once city and under one roof. I started searching online for options for adoption and reading about the different agencies and plans how each place went about it.
I started inquiring late one night via text to this agency as I had liked the things I had read. We then had had a few meetings with the agency making sure this was the direction we were going and started looking online at parents and took home a few books. It didn’t take us long to decide who we wanted. When I called to share who we had picked I was told Jason and Alexa were already being looked at by another mom. My heart sank and I then second guessed our decision, as at that point we were not both on the same page about the other prospective parents we liked, but with Jason and Alexa it was not a question! A few days after I had gotten a call that the mom had changed her mind. I felt a lot of relief when I heard that! Our match meeting was then set. We got to ask questions of them and answer questions they had, as well as got to know some likes and dislikes of each other which we found out we have a lot of similar interests!
We are 2 years out now from our match meeting. I was so nervous going into it but leaving that day I was so sure it was all supposed to be this way! I felt as if this was God's weird way of fulfilling my desire to want to be a surrogate. They were able to come up for an appointment before he was born which I wish I had known sooner as I wanted to give Alexa as much of the other side of the experience as I could since she was not able to carry. The doctor did an ultrasound that day so they could actually see him.
We kept in touch by e-mail and text over the next few short months til he was born. The night he was born we shared pictures with them as soon as we were able and they arrived at the hospital on the 2nd day. We spend quite a bit of time that evening together all in one room and that night they were able to keep him in their room with them.
The hardest part of the journey was leaving the hospital with out him, but I knew he was in good hands and it was the right decision. They sent a few pictures over the next few days and I was able to go meet up with them a few days later! We keep in close contact and I would get updates on appointments and how he was growing and some milestones he was reaching. We get pictures, videos and FaceTime each other which has been nice. We have also gotten together a few times. We continue to build that relationship with each other and couldn’t have asked for it to have turned out any other way! 💕
*Names changed for confidentiality
Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
Leave a Reply.
Working with expectant parents who want to make a life-affirming decision. Preparing couples to grow their family through domestic infant adoption.